Ask any person in West Virginia who has been through a marital breakup and they’ll likely tell you it was an incredibly challenging and stressful event to go through. When you think about it, divorce is not that different from experiencing the death of someone close to you. Obviously, there is no loss of life in a divorce, but separating from a partner whom you have been with for years will likely affect you emotionally and psychologically. You’ll probably feel grief, stress and other negative emotions, and that’s perfectly normal.
You’re going to find that it is virtually impossible to go through the divorce process without feeling some level of stress. The good thing is, you have some control over just how much a divorce affects you internally. The methods you use to manage and cope with these emotions can be the difference in how quickly you recover and heal from a divorce. Here are some ways to cope with stress and facilitate healing amid a divorce.
Allow yourself to feel pain
It probably won’t make you feel better, but it may be reassuring to know that emotional pain is completely normal for those who go through divorce. You’ve lost a life partner. Even if the marriage was miserable and needed to end, you’re still allowed to grieve and mourn the loss. Acknowledging the emotional pain and allowing yourself to grieve and feel this pain are the first steps in the healing process.
Learn to forgive
Regardless of whether the decision to divorce was mutual or not, you may feel the urge to place blame as a way to cope with the hurt you’re experiencing. However, playing the blame game and refusing to accept the events that have happened will only negatively affect you and prolong your healing. Forgiving not just the former spouse, but also yourself, is a crucial part of recovering from a divorce.
Lean on others
Having a support system of family and close friends is vitally important during a divorce. Lean on people who are understanding and willing to listen. Your support system can lift you up out of your emotional pain and grief. It may also be helpful to join a support group of other people who are going through the same experience. A support group can be a place to find acceptance, as well as a non-judgmental approach to hearing and recovery.
The timeframe of healing and recovery from a marital breakup is different for every person. Understand that healing will not happen overnight; it’s going to take time. During an emotionally charged event like divorce, it can be comforting to know that you do not have to go through this experience alone.